The Economy , Creativity & Ethics-Teaching our Children to Choose

As our nation continues to face the effects of the recession, graduates from around the country prepare to compete for the limited positions available. While many attempt to heal from from the plummeting market and the unforgivable Ponzi scheme by one of the our nations most vile citizens,Bernard Madoff, an wounded and untrusting America is left to ponder  why only 20 percent of the graduating class have signed “The M.B.A. Oath,” a voluntary student-led pledge that the goal of a business manager is to “serve the greater good.” It promises that Harvard M.B.A.’s will act responsibly, ethically and refrain from advancing their “own narrow ambitions” at the expense of others.

Are those who chose to sign the voluntary student-led-pledge to be applauded?  The applaud belongs to the parents of these young scholars and future leaders as they have found a way to shelter their children from the plague of social entitlement that runs rampid within our society.  How is it that nearly 80% of Harvard’s graduating class elected to take a pass on signing this student-led-pledge?  Are they leaving the door of advancement through exploitation open and closing the their minds to serving the greater good?  I find this doubtful and am hopeful that the 80% simply did not see the need to sign such a document as it is a given that we are not to exploit our fellow man that we are here to serve the greater good leaving a legacy  that one can be proud of.

The unfortunate exploitation by those in office and others give us opportunity to further teach our children some of the most basic human social graces.  Kindness, the anit-bully campaign that is sweeping our nations schools to ensure safety for all children is purely based upon the simplest concept of kindness.  Madoff’s crimes in their simplest form were unkind causing heartbreak to many including loss of life from despair. 

Each day parents are presented with opportunities to teach their children the effects of choice.  Making better choices is a invaluable life lesson.  Seize each opportunity to better guide your child when confronted with choice.  Perhaps when they are grown and encounter what some would find a “tough choice” they will remember a conversation of the past and find the answer, the ethical answer with ease.

Tolerance is a dirty word

Late last night, Editor-in Chief, Darcy Plunkett sent a quick e-mail asking the Chic Mom Mag’ team members to Tweet her latest blog  http://chicmommagazine.com/blogs/four-important-traits sharing her Mother’s Day experience. Darcy wrote of her emotional response and appreciation  to a church sermon-a bit taken as we have yet to publish an article written by an editor that references a specific faith or practice although we often refer to spirit and spirituality.

Living on the East Cost in one of our nations most diverse cities, one quickly realizes how fortunate it is to be surrounded by diversity and welcomed regardless of one’s color, faith or  family structure.  Human relations are based on mutual understanding which can only come from sharing our unique experiences and our personal interpretation of profound moments, like Darcy’s reflection to a Sunday sermon.

Whether you worship in a mosque, temple or like me tend to ponder life during walking meditation, share you insights with others.  Unshared experience only leads to false interpretation of others further building the walls of prejudice.  Those who claim to tolerate the color and or practices of others should reflect deeply on the word “tolerate”.  

I for one find myself tolerating the sound of the legos dropping on the wooden floor above me as my son, Josa,  attempts to find the perfect part to complete his masterpiece-thousands of little pieces crash.  I tolerate the the stench of the subway station on a hot and humid summer afternoon as I struggle through the crowds hoping to get home in time for dinner.

Rather than “tolerate” perhaps we can begin to accept and embrace our neighbors and their children ending a long history of discrimination against those we deem different when in reality we are one.

Women, Motherhood & Disconnect

Once a woman bears a child society’s message is clear-in no uncertain terms is the desire to be anything but mother to this child  short of selfish which conflicts with the multiple choices women have been presented with throughout child and young adulthood.  The caring for a newborn is all consuming as their needs are endless and through the delirium of sleepless nights and fluctuating hormones one quickly comes to the realization that life has forever been changed.

As the unsolicited opinions of others fill your in box, the seed of disconnect is now planted where the angst of motherhood is sure to flourish.  For most, motherhood brings many joys and just as many frustrations as we struggle to find balance between selflessness and selfishness.  The physical and social disconnect from self that occurs durning the transformation to motherhood can be overwhelming.  

Acceptance, soon to become your daily mantra, and continued reevaluation of self becomes your salvation.  Unfortunately, acceptance and reevaluation come with age.  Your thirty’s near over, tired carpooling moms who have dedicated their lives to enriching the lives of their children and the working moms who have struggled to find balance where few men dare wander, awaken to the quiet of the unknown-somehow without intention a woman was lost along life’s journey as mother. 

Challenge yourself  to bridge the “gap of disconnect”-the greatest challenges and times of uncertainty have the highest potential for growth.

 

What about you? Did you find having children to be liberating? Do you still revel in the liberation or do you long for the days when your biggest problem was deciding which college to apply to or whether a certain job would take you down the right career path?Funny thing is, once the kids come along, we get so ensconced in keeping them alive, then optimizing their experience, ensuring their future, that some of us forget ourselves completely. Then that lack of self starts to bother us. And we start to say the same thing about motherhood. “Is this all there is?”

Which leads to the cliche du Jour: How do we find a balance between selflessness and selfishness? How do we find time to keep bettering ourselves while giving such a huge percentage of our time and energy to our children?

What about you? Did you find having children to be liberating? Do you still revel in the liberation or do you long for the days when your biggest problem was deciding which college to apply to or whether a certain job would take you down the right career pathFunny thing is, once the kids come along, we get so ensconced in keeping them alive, then optimizing their experience, ensuring their future, that some of us forget ourselves completely. Then that lack of self starts to bother us. And we start to say the same thing about motherhood. “Is this all there is?”

Which leads to the cliche du Jour: How do we find a balance between selflessness and selfishness? How do we find time to keep bettering ourselves while giving such a huge percentage of our time and energy to our children?

What about you? Did you find having children to be liberating? Do you still revel in the liberation or do you long for the days when your biggest problem was deciding which college to apply to or whether a certain job would take you down the right career path?

Nurturing Positive Relationships Among Women

A glance across the local market or quick scan of an executive conference room you will find diverse groups of women positioning themselves among peers and colleagues.   This ritual is familiar to most and leads one to wonder why women find it so difficult to support and nurture the decisions, both personal and professional,  of friends and colleagues when we are clearly programmed to do so.  

It is astounding how much emotional energy is spent posturing among women, when in reality if one were to focus on fostering positive relationships with women who support similar views there would be a surge in partnerships that would surly result in greatness.

Look inward and embrace the differences you encounter daily-it is deep within those differences that you are sure to find commonality.

Focus Group held at Posh South Orange, NJ Store

Chic Mom Mag’ held its first focus group at Mia Cose Bella, South Orange, NJ, where shop owner Lisa Murry,  Darcy Plunkett, Editor-in-Chief, and Lynn Wood, Director of Business & Readership Development, welcomed guests to discuss matters of importance to local mothers and grandmothers.  

While  Lynn lured participants from the local Starbucks, Darcy greeted each as through they were friends from childhood. Perhaps the editors of Chic Mom Magazine (www.chicmommagazine.com) once questioned the voice of its readership, but uncertainty was put to rest as mothers shared their desire and need for validation. ”Society manages to overvalue and undervalue mothers at the same time,” stated one participant.

Mothers so often feel detached from society and self as they tend to the needs of their children.  There is little doubt that raising a happy and healthy child is by far the most rewarding endeavor; however it seems somewhat universal that women struggle with finding balance. “Digital and online mags are easier to incorporate into my schedule. I’m online while my kids are doing homework and I’m in the middle of cooking dinner. Easy to carve out 10 minutes to read an article,” said another.

There are many online forums and sites for women yet Chic Mom Magaizne (www.chicmommagazine.com) has risen above the noise by providing mothers a resource representing their voice, a voice of question without judgment, a forum in which women can celebrate the traditions of motherhood while expressing individuality.

Monthly focus groups will be held across North America to keep editors in touch with readership.  For information on upcoming events in Ohio, please e-mail darcy@chicmommagazine.com and for those in the Tri-State area contact stephanie@chicmommagazine.com  You may also leave comment or question on this blog.

Stephanie Jelley of Contour Marketing & Media Joins Chic Mom Mag’ as Contributing Editor

Stephanie Jelley of Contour Marketing & Media, New York City writer, wife and mother joins the ranks of Chic Mom Mag as Contributing Editor, bringing a bit of East Coast edge to the site.  This blog will be an extension of  the experience as contributor to the site, hppt://www.chicmommagazine.com, and it is my hope that our readership take the opportunity to engage in discussion with each of our editors through the various forums linked and/or associated with the site.

We have concluded that the best way to know what readers yearn for is to reach them and to listen to them intimately .  When editors take a moment to touch their audience there is little doubt that the readers voice will be reflected within the body of our work.  

Please visit our site often and join us on Twitter & Facebook-share your experience with The Chic Mom Mag’ Family.